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Home  / News & Publications /  Michigan Catholic News / 2010 /  Pilgrimage brought her closer to Blessed Mother

by Patty Breen special to The Michigan Catholic
Published March 26, 2010

Patty Breen spends a moment in quiet contemplation on her pilgrimage.

As a child, I was like any typical little girl. I loved playing with my baby dolls and Barbies; however, for some reason I would play dress up pretending I was the Blessed Mother. There are many pictures of me walking around the house with a dishtowel or baby blanket on my head pretending to be Mary. There was something about Mary that almost fascinated me, something about this special lady had from the time I was small. One of my favorite movies was (and still is) "The Song of Bernadette." I remember praying as a little girl that the Blessed Mother would appear to me as she did to St. Bernadette in the grotto at Masiebelle. Funny as I look back on those instances, I think Our Lady was trying to get my attention even at that young an age.

As a young adult, one the hardest things for me to understand was the rosary. Praying the rosary for me was about as pleasant as a trip to the dentist; I just couldn't get into it. When our family would pray the rosary on Sunday evenings, I remember rushing through my decade of Hail Marys just so we could finish a little bit sooner, eventually my Mom caught on. I felt that Mary was impossible to relate to; I am certainly not free of sin and I continually struggled with that. Amid my frustration and at times dislike for the rosary and Mary, it was as if she was in the background gently watching over me still.

One day in my religion high school class, we were watching a video on Marian apparitions. In it, I saw video of six young children who thought the Blessed Mother was appearing to them in a little village called Medjugorje since June of 1981. There was something special about seeing the children, and it made an impression on me. On the way home from school that day, I told my Mom about that video and said to her, "Mom, I think I want to go there someday." And like any good Catholic mother, she said, "Patty, if it is God's will, you'll go someday." I didn't realize how true that statement would be.

I graduated from college in May 2008, and as a treat to myself I celebrated with a pilgrimage to Medjugorje. The pilgrimage itself was for much of the time a struggle spiritually; I felt like I was in the desert. And then one night, it all came full circle for me. After dark, I had climbed Apparition Hill (the site of the first reported apparitions). As I look back at my journal from that night, I can still remember it perfectly:

"It was so quiet and peaceful to lay on top of the mountain just gazing up at the statue of Mary and looking at the stars. I found myself meditating on what Jesus said to John from the cross, 'This is your Mother!' The Blessed Mother is a real woman … someone I can go to and talk with. She is not just some picture on a holy card or a statue, but she is really and truly present in our lives. Tonight I realized that Medjugorje has made Our Lady real to me in a personal way (May 15, 2008)."

For the first time in my life, I saw Our Lady as my own mother; that she cared about me, loved me personally. I mattered to the Mother of God as if I was her only little child, and that's how special each of us is to her! I truly "met" Mary personally for the first time in Medjugorje. I love her so much, and am constantly asking her help to become a woman of God, molded in her likeness. I frequently come to her and say, "Mom, please help, I can't do this!" I sense her comforting presence in a real way as I hold my rosary at night in bed just like a child clings to a teddy bear.

When you personally meet and experience the love of Mary, those words "Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners…" will never leave you the same person.

Patty Breen is a member of St. Genevieve Parish in Livonia.

• Vactican commission to study alleged Medjugorje apparitions